A life in the wings

Jude Gray has lived a life at the very heart of British theatre. Now retired, and living in a town centre cottage with her husband, she reflects on a career that placed her alongside some of the industry’s most celebrated names.

‘I’ve been in Berkhamsted for 46 years now,’ she says. ‘But I didn’t grow up here. My father was in the Army for 26 years, so we moved around constantly – I even lived in Germany for five years.’ Eventually, her father settled the family in Watford, giving Jude a place she could call home. ‘After college in Hemel Hempstead, I quickly escaped to London, but when it came time to buy somewhere, I realised I wanted to come back to an area I knew – somewhere that felt like my roots.’

Her path into theatre was, by her own admission, almost inevitable. ‘I’ve always been a show-off. I loved performing. When I was about 14 or 15, I even started my own amateur dramatics group – The Young Girls’ Amateur Dramatic Company, or YGADC.’

But despite her early passion for the stage, Jude soon recognised her strengths lay elsewhere. ‘I went back to college after working for a few years to study drama, and I realised I was a good amateur – but probably not quite good enough to be a professional. Although we’ll never know!’

Instead, she found a way to combine her love of theatre with her practical skills. She had good admin skills from school, so decided to use them in an environment she loved. That decision proved to be the turning point. ‘I did some voluntary work at the Cockpit Theatre in London; there was a vacancy in the office, I pestered and pestered until I got the job.’

That persistence became a defining feature of her career – and a piece of advice she still offers today. ‘If you want to work in theatre, just get your foot in the door. Do anything just to get inside the door. Make yourself indispensable.’

From those early days, Jude built an extraordinary career behind the scenes. She worked at several notable London venues before securing a role at the National Theatre, where she spent nine years as personal assistant to Sir Richard Eyre during his tenure as artistic director. Working at one of the world’s most prestigious cultural institutions is no small task, but Jude embraced it with energy and precision.

She later moved to the Royal Shakespeare Company, working for another nine years as PA to artistic director Adrian Noble. The role required her to divide her time between Stratford-upon-Avon and London’s Barbican. There were a lot of early trains and late nights, she recalls.

Along the way, Jude collected a series of unforgettable encounters: ‘I briefly dated C-3PO,’ she says, referring to actor Anthony Daniels. ‘That was when I was at the Young Vic – he was playing the Player Queen in Rosencrantz and Guildenstern Are Dead.

‘And I once spilled beer on [legendary film and theatre actor] Ian McKellen’s shoes,’ she laughs. ‘I had a half-hour chat with [Death of a Salesman playwright] Arthur Miller. And I remember entertaining Stephen Sondheim [the American Oscar-winning composer and lyricist] in my office.’

Her career eventually came closer to home when she became executive assistant at the Palace Theatre in Watford.

Now retired, Jude is enjoying a slower pace of life. ‘I’m not involved in any local theatre groups,’ she admits. “I fear it’s very hard work – and I’m enjoying my retirement!’ But her love of the arts remains strong. She is a member of the Tring Park branch of the Arts Society, which meets monthly in Berkhamsted.

What do you love most about living in Berkhamsted?

What I love most about living in Berkhamsted is the village-feel, access to London – and the coffee shops. I love strolling down the high street, having a coffee here and there. I also love the Rex and the towpath.

Photo: Jude Gray with Sir Richard Eyre (left) and Adrian Noble